I’ve been very lucky in love.
Having finally found that one transformational, magical love and that love becoming our big fat blended herd of a family, all I want is to stay embedded in the warmth and chaos of it all.
So, very much key to my dream of being amongst my family as much as I can, is to write. I know I’m not alone and quite likely, nothing particularly special, but a dream sits on the back of a belief that you can make change. In my case I hope to write my way into a world where I have to leave my loves less.
The thing about babies is, they need care. Around the clock care. Two becomes particularly labour intensive as they manage to spread the work over longer periods of time. Breastfeeding is great, but again it takes out at least one hand in terms of logistics and comes with its own energy demands.
Now, school runs in the mix. This adds an extra element of fun. Again it takes its wedge of time and its portion of energy.
I have a partner who wholesomely believes in pulling his weight in the relationship and we both pull the same way, but our domestic commitments, his time spent working (often late into the night to allow him to be part of family life in the day) and just trying to live a rounded family life, mean that there is still a lot to do.
So, where to find the energy and the time to commit to writing The Novel That Will Save All (hereto referred to as “The Novel”)?
I’m not an exceptional person. I’ve been happy for too many years to simply relax in my free time and to not commit time and effort to expand my dreams beyond the ordinary. I believe you might call it coasting.
But the thing about transformational love is that it is absolutely that – transformational – it makes you a different person without ever asking. You start to want to build worlds in places where you were quite content with just a cosy little niche in the world as it was. Such a unique love turns you into a revolutionary, ready to take on your most lazy instincts to create and raise castles in which to house your love.
I’m going to have to make time and energy. I’m going to have to commit energy and time I do not have to getting words onto the screen.
Sometimes you have to rip out a part of yourself, so you can fashion it like clay into building blocks, then breathe life into it with sheer will.
Just Real Ruby 